Authority

I hate authority, at least I have for a good part of my life. It is only recently that I have even seen this area as a problem. My inwardly rebellious attitude in many situations is only accentuated when I am placed under strong authority in any situation. It's a problem, I admit this now. There are many reasons, found in the Bible, to respect authority, from the 5th commandment (which I always secretly dispised) to Jesus' admonishment to "give to Caesar what is Caesar's"...meaning that we are not only to respect God, but Earthly authorities as well (except of course, in cases where honoring such authority would dishonor God, or in the case of tyranny (Oscar Shindler is a good example of an appropriate display of disobeying authority, in his case, the Nazi's by protecting Jews). But I digress, I take my dislike of authority and attempt to passive-agressively subvert it in a number of situations. Growing up, I only obeyed the rules in order to situationally benifit myself, not out of respect. Secertly, and sometimes not so secretly, I hated the rules and rulers that I was superfically submitting to.

But then there's this passage in Romans 13 that I really don't like...or at least, don't really want to hear at times.

1Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. 2Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. 3For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and he will commend you. 4For he is God's servant to do you good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword for nothing. He is God's servant, an agent of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. 5Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also because of conscience. 6This is also why you pay taxes, for the authorities are God's servants, who give their full time to governing. 7Give everyone what you owe him: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor. (Romans 13:1-7 NIV)

Yeah, um...well, um...I guess that sort of goes against the "f--- authority" mantra that I have always found to be so attractive. I often strive so hard to be an "independent free spirit" that I violate God's commandment to respect authority. That last part of verse one is the most crucial for me: "for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God". That means that the authority of George W. Bush, my parents, my boss(es), spiritual leaders (in church or at CRU) and others are ultimately ordained by God. At least, being someone who takes the commands of the Bible literally, I believe that is what it is saying. Tyrannical authority in my life (which I fortuntely experence infrequently) also comes from the soverign will of God...even if I don't like it. God will always work out his will (and work it out for the good of those who believe in him.

The answer that I am coming to is that I need to be more reluctant to embrace my rebellious impluses. I may hate it when people tell me what to do, but, if I can't learn to take orders and respect leaders, how can I respect God? I have often thought that I can seperate the two, and in some cases I have been successful in doing so but in others I have failed miserably and basically spat at God. I can write this out and make it sound good, make it sound as if I have come to a major spiritual breakthrough in my life, but I haven't. I am merely recognizing this as a huge problem in my life, one that I need to finally take the initiative to address. It will not become magically any easier for me to respect authority unless I learn to first respect the authority of God in my life.

- Jordan